Discussion in 'Off-Topic English' started by ShaeKonnit, Jan 15, 2018.
So their staff was reduced to a shadow of their former selves after many opted to run?
Ok, I know.
It's a bit easy but ...
I genuinely hope that's just an unfortunate timing where the map pin is rendered before globe is rotated to the correct spot...
r.e. Shadowrun embezzlement, is it me, or was the company that makes Shadowrun just acting totally in-character?
"It ain't a real Shadowrun 'till your Johnson screws you. Twice."
Though I gotta admit I prefer the typical Shadowrun answer to discovering embezzlement: calling a Shadowrun on the offender's head. (delivery of the rest of the body is entirely optional)
It was my faither's birthday party on saturday and was a bit of a WtF-fest.
For starters the DJ sucked. The audience are mainly old and my faither is now 70 years old. Why the hell the DJ thought they'd want to listen to Saturday Night by Whigfield, or the god-damn Baby Shark song I have no idea. We could have replaced him with a phone with Spotify and it would have been better.
The biggest WtF, however, was the cake.
On the outside it looked ok - large base decorated to look like a country road and with a sculpted charicature of faither driving his Mazda MX-5 on the top. The taste was very different - it was fucking awful. I would be surprised if anyone genuinely liked it. There was plenty left at the end of the night, that's for sure!
Yesterday I got given another big lump of it and now that I had the time to taste and analyse it, I think I may have discovered the issue - it's bread.
I tasted the "sponge" on its own with no icing or filling, and it's god-damn bread.
So we essentially got a big loaf of farmhouse with the crusts cut off and a layer of fondant draped over the top.
Either they've been scammed or the baker is a hack; either way it's a disgrace, and whoever it was doesn't deserve any more business.
That's really unfortunate. Leaning toward scam because cake sponge and bread take very different processes, so it could hardly have been unintentional
That's a scam alright, hard to do that by mistake.
You know what they say ...
If you play with the johnson too much, you'll go blind ...
I have a theory that all party DJs follow the same algorithm:
1. decade = now
2. play songs from decade
3. If > 12 people on dancefloor:
3a. play songs from that decade all night
4a. go down a decade
5. return to step 2
It's the only plausible means by which I can fathom that a 70th birthday would end up playing baby shark et al (>12 occured when all the grandkids are dancing). And simultaneously explain how a 30th birthday I went to a while back ended up with the DJ playing 'Jive Bunny Mega Mixes' all night (the 30-somethings were too interested in drinking, so we got all the way to the late 50s before all the grandparents/aunts/uncles got up to dance)
On the night there were only 2 kids in total.
Another dumb incident was when we got faither up to cut his cake. People were just starting to move then suddenly the DJ starts singing Happy Birthday into his microphone. I thought, "Oh, so we're doing it now then?!" - he could have announced it, or something. No - that would require some actual skill.
Yeah definitey just a shit DJ then
I mean, I'm not pretending theres no skills involved in being a competent mobile disco operator, but I imagine most of it is common sense
The main skills required to be a party DJ is:
1. Awkward dancing skills while somehow standing still.
2. Wavy rap hand for any kind of song even when it doesn't fit.
3. Being able to manage a laptop playing a series of tunes by itself.
4. COmpletely miss the target audience.
In short, get someone who knows the people there to do it.
That's some nice Romano-Arabic numeral fusion ya got there.
The fun bit is technically speaking WW2 can be regarded as the 8th or 9th world war, if you use a pretty loose definition of "world war". Meaning we're actually in the middle of world war 10 or 11 now (cold war, war on terror)
Thats how i keep annoying workmates with Van Goghs ear for music away from my workplace.
5- completely ignore any recommandations provided by the future couple (in case of wedding)
"I know not with what weapons World War 10 will be fought, but World War 11 was fought with dimensional rift generators and transchronic disruptors." - B. Zweistein