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W tee Eff?!

Discussion in 'Off-Topic English' started by ShaeKonnit, Jan 15, 2018.

  1. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    I do wonder if a "victim" could get away with it - as far as they know they have just been assaulted with intent to cause grievous injury.
    Either way, it is a damn stupid idea for a prank.
     
  2. leigen_zero

    leigen_zero Morat Pacifist

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    Yeah, think some guy online pointed out there is actually grounds under the definition of common assault to get the guy a visit from a few kindly gentlemen in blue uniforms, as the definition of assault does not require actual harm to happen, just that the victim must fear they will come to harm.

    Assault is a summary offence in England and Wales, with the case heard only at a Magistrates' Court.[8][9] Although R v Little considered assault a statutory offence, none of the statutes referred to contain any definition of assault.[6] The actus reus, endorsed in R v Ireland,[c 2] is any act by D that causes V to apprehend immediate and unlawful personal violence.[10] The term "force" rather than "violence" is used by the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS).
     
  3. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    I had a great one this morning...
    For the past few months I've been using the Royal Mail's "Drop n' Go" service. Wherein I load a sack with my post for the day, accompanied by a manifest of what's going where, and I just leave it at the post office and they take care of it, with all charges placed on a Drop n' Go account which I manage online.
    They've been kind enough to keep me supplied with official mail sacks so I don't need to use garbage bags or anything like that. If I need more, I just ask them.
    This morning was one such occasion where I needed more sacks, so the woman at the post office handed me a bundle of them, all folded up.
    As I walked them from the car to the office I thought I felt something inside one of the sacks.
    I opened it up and there it was - one of the letters I left to be posted, yesterday!

    Bloody hell, that was a close one :/
    £10 worth of X-Wing cards could easily have vanished into the ether.
     
  4. Flipswitch

    Flipswitch Sepsitorised by Intent

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    god its forking cold int he uk atm
     
  5. leigen_zero

    leigen_zero Morat Pacifist

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    It's always forking cold in the uk
     
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  6. Flipswitch

    Flipswitch Sepsitorised by Intent

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    its always forking damp in the uk
     
    PreacherSaul likes this.
  7. colbrook

    colbrook Grenade Delivery Specialist

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    Chilly here too, I'm not sure if it will hit 30C again this week :(
    Screenshot_20180213-133431.png
     
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  8. leigen_zero

    leigen_zero Morat Pacifist

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    It's still the rainy season in the UK, temperatures will go up when it ends
     
  9. cazboab

    cazboab Definitely not Cazboaz.

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    Of coarse the problem is it never bloody ends...
     
  10. tdc

    tdc ALEPH Fragment
    Warcor

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    Agreed, stupid rain. rain means wet feet... I dislike wet feet.
     
  11. leigen_zero

    leigen_zero Morat Pacifist

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    Wet feet means you're wearing the wrong shoes buddy.
     
  12. tdc

    tdc ALEPH Fragment
    Warcor

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    Most certainly true, I need to find some decent walking boots that actually will keep water out regardless of what my antipode drags me through for a couple of hours each day.
     
  13. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    Announcement on the news today is that the average Brit consumes more calories per day than recommended.
    My goodness, me!
    Modern journalism, folks.
     
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  14. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    I've just been asked by someone if they can use my box cutter (the knife specifically designed to cut boxes, which I use for cutting boxes) to cut boxes.
    She was worried if it might blunt the blade.
     
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  15. leigen_zero

    leigen_zero Morat Pacifist

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    Well, it will, but...

    WTF from the Mrs May this morning:
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-43106736

    Several years ago Conservative party raised tuition fees to be one of the highest in the world, now same party is commisioning an independent review into why our tuition fees are so damn expensive
     
  16. xagroth

    xagroth Mournful Echo

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    It's called "give money to my friend, make it look like he does something" and "oh friend of mine, produce evidence this fuckup I made is not my fault".

    Being spanish means we are used to this kind of "political level"...

    As for my contribution... Galician president (a region on Spain) was filmed posing for some photos with garbage he was taking from the side of a river, to promote consciousness about keeping clean rivers. The film showed what the photos didn't, that being said president throwing the piece of garbage he just have picked from the side into the river after each photo... -.-U

    Worst part? I don't know the man's looks, I don't know if the video is truly with that man or another one and they slapped the name, but I wouldn't be surprised either way...
     
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  17. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    In my engineering work they got this cheap-ass PC from PCNoob (PC World) for all the admin/business stuff.
    God-damn thing tries, and fails, to give itself a windows update on a daily basis now.

    All it has on it is spreadsheets, yet it's suffering more problems than my older laptop, with all its games, music, movies, and casual browsing.
     
  18. Danger Rose

    Danger Rose The Wrecking Belles

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    Here's my WTF. I work at my country's biggest Hospital at the Emergency Service. We spent millions on the Electronic File and from and Administrative point of view, I was in Heaven. No more lost files, no more "You will have to return in Business Hours to settle that"; about 8 months ago we got hit by the Wannacry virus and we're still working with paper files. I had a poor lady left unattended for 3 days because her chart got misplaced and another patient's file sent to the Morgue. The guy was going for an urologic procedure and a mistake had him declared dead.
     
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  19. Durian Khaar

    Durian Khaar It's clubbering time...
    Warcor

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    That is quite unsettling :scream:
     
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  20. ShaeKonnit

    ShaeKonnit Well-Known Member

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    That is some Brazil level shit.
    Unfortunately I could believe there'd be some folk standing, looking at the "dead" man and discussing what to do with him as he protests.

    Which reminds me of this gaming-related WtF from a while back:
    It was with Pistol Prick at the helm of Dark Heresy and there quickly came a point where I realised he was just telling a story; not running a game. Part of the problem was he'd just have us making tests for various skills, seemingly just to give the impression it was actually a game, since we were technically rolling dice. Some of those tests included Perception tests to check if our characters would notice things that we really would not need to make tests for...
    Things such as testing if we can hear a fire alarm going off in the room we're currently standing in. Noticing a garbage truck driving at us down an empty street in the dead of night with no other traffic. Noticing a crashed trans-atmospheric lander, which we just watched being shot down, on a wide-open platform. Noticing a 15ft-tall daemon host pulling apart some screaming victims on an otherwise empty platform.
    If we failed any of those tests, our allegedly professional band of Acolytes would be standing there completely oblivious as the Hive falls down about our heads.

    Way I described it was if he was running Garden of Gethsemane, and Judas is just about to step up and betray Jesus:
    Jesus notices the party of Romans, and watches Judas stride up to him.
    Judas kisses him on the cheek.
    Roman Centurion rolls Perception. Fails. "Well, where is he?"
    Judas looks back in astonishment and ashamedly points at Jesus.
    Centurion sweeps his gaze from side to side, "What Jewish trickery is this? Well, come on, lads. Back to the barracks - we've been double-crossed! You'll get lashes for this, Judas!" and off they go.
     
    #80 ShaeKonnit, Feb 22, 2018
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2018
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